So a few of my guildies have decided that now is the time to get chatting to each other in the game through Ventrilo in the hopes that running heroics will be easier if the healer (me) can shout "get out of the fire" rather than attempt to type it and therefore in my slowness that person dies...great plan I thought!
So the other night I downloaded vent and although I didn't have a microphone I could hear all that was being said and got really enthusiastic about how great it will be to talk, so the following day being Saturday, I made my husband promise me we would go into town and buy headsets...we did and they are great.
Now, I'm not a quiet person as I'm sure my husband will tell you and having worked part time when I was younger in a call centre and spent pretty much all my life on stage, I'm not afraid of headsets and microphones.
I spent the whole of yesterday excited about getting the microphones set up and it working, and then when it came to actually speak to my guildies, I managed 'hello' and that was it. Something clicked in me and I suddenly was overcome with a nervousness and shyness that I never expected.
When I first started playing WoW, for a short time my character was in a very good guild that were my husband's friends and I felt awkward, I felt like I couldn't say anything because I thought they would laugh at my newness and as soon as I could I pleaded with my husband that we leave that guild because "everyone is laughing at me behind my back" they weren't, of course they weren't but I felt self-conscious and lacking confidence. Over the last couple of months that has changed. I'm confident in my abilities as a healer, and due to spending hours online I feel like I'm fairly well geared and my stats are what they should be or close enough, and I can keep people alive without going OOM, but being faced to actually speak to people that belong to my guild, I have those same feelings again. I am new to the game, how can I possibly lead people? and the massive hurdle to overcome? what if I say something really stupid?
I think overtime, just like my guild fear, this one will also go away... however, this time I'm not going to run away like I did before. I'm going to try really hard to conquer my fear.
If anyone has any tips or remember how you felt the first time you used vent I would love to hear them!